I love watching other mamas shop at my local supermarket. It’s the great leveler because we all need food, right? It’s not like we find ourselves in Baby Dior every day. It’s where our true selves come out to play because we’re in a rush, ticking one more thing off the list, and trying to keep our act together.
The Humanitarian – She strolls the aisles and repeatedly tells everyone around her, and her children that not everyone has food. She can be overheard saying “Cornflakes? You think they have cornflakes in Somalia?” She believes in giving her kids the bare minimum so that they learn to appreciate that not everyone has what they have. This is also known as guilt-tripping.
Speed: Sauntering. Nothing is as important as remembering that no man is an island.
Purpose: Think about others and add a dash of guilt for behavior modification
The Educator – This mama zones in on creating the potential learning opportunity in every mundane task. Her kids learn to spell INJUSTICE before their own name and that’s just because she prioritizes explaining real issues and less the teaching of basic colors. A definite over explainer, you will find a lot of obscure objects in her cart: truffles, squid and quinoa because the spelling is tricky.
Speed: Walking with intentional steps
Purpose: Be the change you want to see in the organic aisle
The Mom Who Lives off Netflix – She’s never written a weekly meal plan in her life. Who would do that? In her cart: 1. crackers because they can be eaten on the go; 2. milk because they we all need milk; 3. orange juice because it makes her feel better getting that 7-a-day servings of fruit and veg into kids who hate all things green, and 4. a taco dinner kit.
Speed/Pace: No time to chat or look at prices. She throws whatever she’s craving into her cart.
Purpose: Netflix before You
The Opportunist – She treats all the aisles like a soft play area. Usually a working mom with no time to organize playdates or orchestrate pick up and drop offs. In her cart you’ll find a lot of frozen items: vegetables, hamburger meat and always a carton of ice cream to soften the blow that she has to work after dinner… again.
Speed: Trying to stroll but has an eye on the clock.
Purpose: No time to take you to that new play place as promised, knock yourselves out in the fruit and veg aisle!
When in doubt, stay at home and be The Invisible Mom ordering groceries online… so much easier to drink coffee while you do that.
