YOUR STORY

Do I Love my Children the Same?

25 February, 2019 | Olga Levchenko
  • Do I Love my Children the Same?
Image Credit: Hisu Lee

I don’t. I am honest and open about it.

It’s impossible to love children the same way: they are different genders, ages, looks, personalities, attitudes. They were born to different mothers because with each child we change so much. I love each one of them for who they are with love as unique as they are. 

Being open about it helps a lot. I remember when one of my kids asked me who I love the most.

“How can I answer that? I have my firstborn, a beautiful girl, kind, funny, brave, honest, who loves the ocean and writing. And I have a boy, my youngest, who has a perpetual smile, naughty always on his mind, and loves chess and sports.” As I said it, I have noticed a beatific, pleased expression on my child’s face. The message was delivered.

My kids used to fight who would get a seat closer to me, give me more kisses, hugs me tighter. It bothered me a lot because one of them would be naturally be left out. So, I invented a saying for the dominating one “You can’t be friends with me without the other kid. We are family” or “just think of it, if your brother/sister is upset, then I will have to spend more time with him/her because he/she needs comfort.” So, the adaptation period for us was brief.

I think children have to learn that our hearts are big enough for many people, and love comes in all shapes and sizes. They also have to know that each of them has a unique way of connecting with people and it utterly depends on who they, children, are.


About The author

We all get something right in the way we raise our children. What if we get it ALL right? Olga Levchenko is a mother who has found a blueprint for happy, resilient, successful children.


RECENT
How to Rekindle Romance After Childbirth
Having a baby is an expression of your love for each other.
Fertility Apps To Support Birth Control Or Conception
Fertility apps work by tracking women’s cycles and providing data about their fertility.
How To Get Your Kids Excited For The Outdoors
There’s a lot to love about spending some time indoors as a family, sure, but there is a thing as too much!
Hosting An At-Home Birthday Party For Your Child
The only option is to host an at-home birthday party that makes your child forget about all their worries!