If you have kids, you know exactly what it means when people say that their life is not their own anymore. Your children may bring you all of the joy in the world, and you will no doubt love them with all of your heart and will run over hot coals for them, but raising them does require sacrifice.
From sleepless nights, nappy changing, and feeding routines right through to where you need to always go to child-friendly places or miss out on social events. Eventually you become a taxi service for your kids as they grow up. You run around after them, clean up for them, cook their meals, have difficult conversations with them, and do everything in your power to make sure that they are well looked after and happy.
But, in all of this, where are you looking after yourself? When you put yourself on the back burner for too long it can cause emotional issues and a person ends up really affecting their wellbeing. It is vital that you make the time and learn to look after your own mental wellbeing, or ultimately, it may affect your ability to fulfill your role as a parent.
There are often barriers to reclaiming your social life after you have become a dad. If most of your social circle are not parents, then you have a completely different priority in life and it can make coming together more challenging.
Secondly, having children is a physical barrier to going out and seeing friends. Having to look after them will takes up time, and it may not be fair if you get to go out all of the time while your partner is stuck at home. It may also be that your social scene was based on you as a couple.
One solution is to hire a babysitter. You can use a service such as UrbanSitter and find someone nearby who can look after your children.
Try and reconnect with old friends as much as you can, but do not rule out looking for new friends. There are plenty of groups on Facebook which allow people to form new friendships near home.
If you are struggling to keep yourself engaged, it may mean that you need a new hobby. If there is something that you have always wanted to do, like learn guitar or take up rock climbing, now is the time to do it.
Engaging in something new will give you something to think about other than taking care of the kids. It will help you stay mentally engaged with life and can be a good outlet for any emotional issues you may be experiencing. Taking up hobbies is also a very good way of getting out and meeting lots of new and likeminded people.