As a single dad, I often had to balance my son’s desire to go out and play with his need to do homework. I used to watch him relentlessly trying to finish his assigned schoolwork so he could spend a few short hours with his friends outside. My heart softened watching him try so hard, and then the thought hit me — there must be some ways to find a better school-life balance so he can enjoy the time of being a kid without his academic demands disrupting so many of his afternoons.
Fortunately, there are practical, dad-tested strategies to help your children find a healthy balance between school and life, allowing them to thrive both inside and outside the classroom.
Redefine Your Meaning of Balance
When you think of balance, what do you envision? Surely, balance is a 50/50 split between work and play. As a working adult, this might make sense, possibly even leaning more toward work at times. However, you must consider that “balance” for your child goes beyond rigid scheduling.
At a young age, balance means meeting their academic, social and emotional needs in a way that best aids their development and growth. Some days, homework might take precedence, while others may need more playtime or social interaction. The key is to remain flexible and responsive to your kid’s needs, understanding that what appears balanced for you can change daily for a child. Achieving a school-life balance is crucial for alleviating stress and helping children develop resilience and emotional well-being.
The stresses you experience when balancing work and family responsibilities also apply to children juggling their time, except they’re likely less adept at feeling pulled in different directions. By focusing on overall well-being rather than a perfect schedule, we can create an environment where our kids can thrive both in school and in life.
Build a Routine That Works
Now that you’re looking at balance from a different perspective, the next trick is to identify a daily rhythm that brings out the most productivity in your child. I’m perhaps fortunate that my son enjoys going to bed early and waking refreshed in the mornings. From a parental perspective, this routine is terrific as it means there’s no rush to get ready for school.
While this routine lasts and there’s time in the morning, I am happy for my boy to complete a maximum of 30 minutes of homework before we leave for school. I assign the work for him to carry over from the day before — he completes it with no problems in the morning when he’s fresh. That way, my kid gets extra time to play in the afternoons, working off energy so he’s ready for bed at a scheduled time.
Bear in mind that all children are different, so what works in our household may not work in yours. You might have to be more flexible. First, identify your child’s energy, responsibilities and goals — then sit together and develop a specific rhythm that will honor those and make the after-school environment more comfortable and proactive. And don’t be afraid to change the routine if it isn’t working.
Encourage Productivity and Communication
Encouraging productivity does not mean sitting with your feet up in the living room and suggesting your child go outside and play in the garden instead of playing a game online. Consider some of your favorite productive hobbies, such as cooking new dishes or playing instruments, and determine how you can include your child in them. Finding quality time to enjoy activities together in between homework and screen time can encourage a positive work-life balance.
As a parent, throwing a baseball or building a fort with your child helps you identify the activities they enjoy and excel at. This helps them realize their aptitudes early. Moreover, the bond between you will grow as your kid realizes you’re paying attention and value their company, becoming more comfortable opening up to you about things of concern. Frequent and meaningful communication between parent and child is valuable, especially when teaching them essential life skills and identifying potential problems that could disrupt their studies or emotional well-being.
Show your interest without being overbearing. A strong school-life balance means there will be times your youngster will value being by themselves. Allowing them this alone time without structured activity or constant hovering helps to promote independence, creative thought and emotional fortitude — all valuable as they grow. However, don’t allow too much of it as it’s all a part of maintaining balance. If you suspect there may be another issue prompting them to desire alone time, consider asking open-ended questions that encourage a more detailed response.
Alternate Work and Play With Rest
Alone time for your child might stem from the need to rest, relax and escape from the chaos of the world outside the window — time to temporarily forget about math problems and nap after being physically active with neighbors. Children who are kept busy for extended periods can lose concentration or become overwhelmed by excessive activity, whether school-related or play-related. Insufficient rest may result in mood swings or meltdowns. If these symptoms persist even when your child gets enough rest, then they might be displaying signs of anxiety that should be taken seriously.
I’ve learned to allow my son time to play on his phone in a quiet corner and forget about everything else for a while. It’s incredible that, after doing so, he’s much more willing to continue his homework or spend the twilight hours with his dad in the backyard. Build rest time into your child’s routine, but don’t force it on them. When it’s time to rest, they’ll do so willingly.
Once your child has a flexible routine and understands how their body and mind work best, you’ll be surprised at how well they stick to it. At the start, you might need to issue a small reminder about homework, screen time usage or bedtime on occasion. Once your kid is comfortable and in rhythm, the responsibility you’ve given them to maintain their balanced routine will become more evident.
Collaborate Instead of Dictating
Helping your children find a better school-life balance works best when you collaborate with them, rather than dictating terms. Doing so means communicating openly and understanding each other. Work with your children to establish a routine that fosters the best versions of themselves, including time for homework, productive play and rest when necessary. This encourages growth in all aspects of life.